September 22, 2005 - Bob
Los Angeles, CA
We have been receiving phenomenal support. There have been some wonderful additions to the project. The Michael J Fox Foundation is now officially on board alongside the National Parkinson Foundation -- getting them to coexist is really something (see below). Though they represent the same illness, they have different approaches as to how to spend the money they receive. In a nutshell, Michael J Fox Foundation is 100% research-based in search of a cure. The National Parkinson Foundation divides it’s money in to research as well as care for those who now live with the disease. There is no right or wrong here and I greatly appreciate both groups willingness to stand by one another with this film.
Great, great, great stuff.
So...our thought is to continue on the marketing front for now -- seeking out individuals who will champion the cause. Hopefully a nice stack of letters will go a long way to helping us be seen where we need to be seen.
I was speaking to my dad a few weeks ago and he sounded very small and distant, as he gets when he is sad, angry or frustrated. They had just begun a massive kitchen remodeling project and right as it began, my mom went into a deep depression, meaning she is not available to manage the project she set up. My dad really hoped to do nothing more than sign the checks. Stress is particularly damaging to him now with Parkinson’s. This is one of the areas where the cognitive effects of his disease come into play. He can’t process things the way he’s used to and he’s aware of it. Then he gets frustrated by that and the vicious cycle continues to spin.
I drove up to see my parents and check things out firsthand. It was as if the house I grew up in was suddenly under a dark veil. The kitchen being torn out is a dramatic thing no matter what mental/spiritual state any house and its inhabitants are in. But because my mom and, therefore, my dad, were both in such a weakened state, the entire house felt as if it were nearly lifeless.
Mom had been down for several weeks already and it was really stressing my dad out. What I mean by mom being “down” is that she literally doesn’t get out of bed but for 15-30 minutes a day. She’ll get up, get a little something to eat, often say something about an upset stomach and that she needs to “go lie down for a moment” then be gone again for several hours. To be clear: she’s not making this illness up. She really does vomit and goes through all the physical pain she’s describing. So far as I can tell, there’s nothing anyone can do for her. My dad, on the other hand, is dealing on a daily basis and trying to avoid a depressed state himself. He could use the support. He really needs my mom, but she’s checked out.
After much soul searching, I knew I couldn’t be a whole lot of help from a distance. I asked my dad if he wanted me to move up to help out. My dad, as I’ve said before is a very proud man and has a very difficult time asking for anything. He said “yes” without hesitation.
It was a relief and quite scary at the same time.
The next big call was to Annamaria. How was she going to take this? She was just getting into a relatively new job she’d been working as a massage therapist. She was making good money and finally enjoying Los Angeles (no small feat for her). When I asked her what she thought, she didn’t hesitate either: “Let’s move up there”. I’d loved her for nearly three years at that point -- but never had I loved her more than when she answered so selflessly and supportively.
This is a big change and very sudden, but one I am very honored to have the ability to make.
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