Boys of Summer Book - Entry #141

You can see the complete film "Boys of Summer" for free by clicking here. 

100% proceeds go to the Michael J Fox Foundation. 

February 1, 2006 - Bob
Walnut Creek, CA

Even though Sundance, in and of itself, was a bust for us, there are a number of positive things happening.

Mike O’Leary, our contact from Phoenix has helped us with a contact at Harkins Theaters (the local chain there). I pitched the film to them with the idea of having a week-long screening during spring training and they are considering it. As baseball zealots across the country travel to Arizona for spring training, there is an excellent built in audience at that time who could take the story of the film with them back to their home market (opening up more screenings across the country).

I’ve also sent out 100 invites to various production/distribution companies in Los Angeles. Even if we get a little bit of interest, maybe someone will send one of their unpaid interns an hour (depending on traffic) east to check out out little film.

The mo' is rolling forward!
e-mail invite:

Subject: Boys of Summer in Riverside International Film Festival

Here's the details:

Tuesday, Feb. 21 6:30 PM
Location: University Village Theater 4226 Highland Pl, Riverside, CA 92506
Cost: $8 adults, $5 students

We are an official entry, with the prize being help in doing a digital to film transfer (huge help -- big cost) -- so please invite lots of people!
Feb. 10, 2006
Further Acceptance!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Your Documentary has been accepted for the Sport Movies & TV – 1st Mumbai International FICTS Festival.

Organized in the heart of world’s biggest film Industry BOLLYWOOD (in Mumbai, INDIA) where close to 1000 films are made every year, “Sport Movies & TV – 1st Mumbai International FICTS Festival” gives an opportunity for the filmmakers to come and interact with this throbbing film Industry to network and collaborate to jointly make more films.

The high turnout expected (all shows are likely to be packed) at the Festival will have a dynamic mix of Industry professional viz. FILM FINANCIERS, PRODUCERS, DIRECTORS, FILM STARS and regular film buffs thereby providing opportunities to be seen around and mingle with the best.

At stake are Golden Ten Awards and Silver Ten Awards for BEST FILMS / SHORT FILMS / DOCUMENTARIES in each category. The winning
films / Documentaries will get a direct entry in the Milan edition of the Festival, which takes place every year in October in Milan, Italy to compete for for the Guirlande d' Honneur worth thousands of Euros.

Films are to be judged by a top Jury comprising Professionals from the world of Cinema, Advertising, Sports and Media. There will be ample opportunities for filmmaker such as you, to interact and promote your film with many stalwarts of Bollywood, ranging from the field of direction, production to distribution. Filmmakers also get a chance to mingle with the biggest Indian and International stars at the Grand Awards & Closing Ceremony Night & Party where the stars will come out to celebrate this grand event. The topline Media will be there to witness the Winners from each category.
 

Boys of Summer book Entry #44

The Boys of Summer continue roll along - for the latest please see our website.
 
Interviewing my sister (Dallas)

Bob:
What did you think of the news stories?

Sis:
I thought it was interesting that Dad wasn’t aware of what his condition looked like. I mean, I know when you’re with yourself every single day, you’re not necessarily aware of subtle changes and over time the things he remarked about, the way his mouth was, the way he holds himself, I was a little surprised that it surprised him so much.

It felt sad to me because it felt like he was acknowledging a new level of the disease and it’s progression. There was a reality that I don’t think he had moved into and  it was hard to see him move into it.

Bob:
What’s your memory of dad as a dancer?

Sis:
(laughs)
The gator. When he’d throw himself on the floor and wiggle around on his back. When he’d twist around with mom. Yeah. always just wild.

Bob:
Did you know he can’t keep a beat anymore?

Sis:
Wow. No I wasn’t aware of that. I’m so used to seeing people not be able to keep a beat at work I guess I didn’t even recognize it. (laughs) the only couple of times I did look out into the audience was when my side of the audience was screaming against the other side and he was standing up with his hands in the air.

I have to remind myself of the dad in the form I used to know him. He doesn’t -- Every time I’m around him I catch a memory or a glimpse of that. I think the first time was when we were in Vegas, when we had our reunion. We went to see “Finding Nemo” and I saw that (slack-jawed/frozen) look for the first time. And I had been warned by both you and Aunt Denise, but as I saw him my first thought was, “That’s not my dad”. That’s not what I remember.

I’m getting more used to it. But just seeing him, tonight, he just looked so frail. He looked frail to me. I saw him on the couch with his legs up and I felt like I could envision him in a hospital with his legs up like that. I know that sounds pretty dramatic, but I could envision that. And I was trying to remember dad as a runner and dad as a tennis player, and dad as an avid athletic full-of-life person. And, that dad is no longer. So it’s kind of a, kind of a slow death. And every time I see him I process a little more of it.

Bob:
What is the core of dad at this point for you?

Sis:
Almost an innocence. He seems like he’s aware and accepting of his condition and with a sense of humor will say, “well, I can still tie my shoes” and “ I can still put on my pants.” Like he’s still trying to be very optimistic. At his core I guess he’s still trying to keep it together. He’s trying to do all the things he wants to. I think as long as he’s golfing, things are okay. The day that goes away, I think it’s going to be  a very tough loss. Golf has been a thread of normalcy throughout his life. He still cooks and he still plays golf. As for activities, those are both threads that have run through his life. I think as long as he can do that, he’ll be okay.

I would call him a passive fighter. He is aware and open but not vigilant. And not aggressive. But open to ideas. If things came to him or in a way which he can grasp them, he’s open. But I don’t necessarily see that he’s out for every possible solution that’s out there.

I’ve always known dad to just kind of roll with what comes. He doesn’t try to make it one way or another. It just is what it is. I don’t know that he is the kind of person who is the “chart my own destiny, make my own path” kind of person. I think he kind of set on a path and went with it.

Bob:
What are your early baseball memories with dad?

Sis:
I remember when dad took me to get my first glove. We probably went to Big 5 because that’s where we always went to get sports equipment -- especially on sales days; those were big days to get shoes. It was a Spalding glove . And there was such a small section of lefty gloves. It was one of my first realizations that I lived in a smaller world than the righties and had fewer choices. He showed me how to put a ball in it and put the oil/conditioner on it and wrap it overnight with a rubber band. I don’t remember us playing catch. We had a pitch back -- kind of a trampoline. Other than that, I don’t really remember playing with dad. I remember him coming to my games. We played whiffle ball in the back yard some days.

Bob:
What do you think of the trip dad and I are taking?

Sis:
Exciting. I think it’s a full circle move spiritually and otherwise. It’s something you set out for a long time ago. I don’t want to talk about the disease in terms of “it’s going to be this way” or “it has to be this way”. I don’t really look for outcomes in things. I hope that dad feels that he connects with you on a deeper level, that he finds some more peace with himself and other members of his community -- that he has a deeper sense of community. So that there’s not as much loneliness in it. I hope that he laughs a lot and has a lot of fun. I hope that you guys can create something that will be timeless.

Bob:
If dad didn't wake up tomorrow, would you be  at peace with him?

Sis:
Yeah. I love my dad. I had such a great opportunity early in my recovery to make amends for the things I felt like were shortcomings as his daughter. And then to go full circle again, with me going out of the family and then coming back into the family, I think that was the biggest peace that I’ve arrived at  and his response to my coming back into the family, those were words I’ve always wanted to hear. As much as I’ve wanted more from dad, he’s made peace with what is.

What frustrates me is I’m not a “what is” person. I’m more of a “okay, that’s what is -- I want more”, I think that’s who I am. I think that’s probably where my conflict with dad came from. “How could you be at peace with this? It could be different.” And he’s always been, “It is what it is”. Neither way is right or wrong but I’m sure that’s where some of our conflicts have come from.

I remember when I came back into the family, that really strong sense of, all dad ever wanted was for me to be just me. He just wanted me to be happy and be part of the family. I mean, dad has never asked for more. I remember when we talked for the first time about me being gay. I remember him saying, “you’ve chosen a really tough life.” and I think other than that, the only way we can show we love another person is to respect their choices whether we agree with them or not. Ever since that issue came up, it’s never been about agreeing or disagreeing, it’s been about respecting. Which is probably a pretty high level place when you think about it.

I think if there was one more thing I want to say to dad, I just want to say that I love him. He’s taught me so much through example to do, or show me things I might do differently. I would miss him because I think he’s just a great person. And I want more time. But that’s not my call. That’s going to happen when it happens. I guess I’m at peace with him, yeah, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be sad. (she starts to cry) He’s the only dad I’ve got and I finally got here. I just want more time.

But that’s the way it is, it had to go the way it went. And I don’t regret it. I’m just, you know, this is some journey for some reason. I just want more time. He’s still very sharp. If anything, it just might be the confidence or maybe the fear of not being understood. I still feel like he engages very well in conversation and is mentally sharp. I still very much appreciate that. Physically, maybe we can’t do some of the things we used to do -- I guess we could go miniature golfing, but -- we can’t play tennis, say. Not like we used to play all the time or anything.

I don’t feel like there’s anything left unsaid. I know he’s extraordinarily proud of me. And I know he loves me. And I’m so glad he’s my dad. And I know he knows that I love him. I
don’t know what else I could want.

The Boys of Summer continue roll along - for the latest please see our website.

 

Boys of Summer book Entry #43

The Boys of Summer continue roll along - for the latest please see our website.

 

Interviewing Mom (In Dallas) * June 26, 2004

Bob:
What’d you think of the news tape videos?

Mom:
I thought they were great. I thought it showed your purpose, what you’re doing, your love of your father, which is special.

Bob:
What do you think about the degeneration dad is going through because of Parkinson’s?

Mom:
Breaks my heart. Absolutely, breaks my heart. Even not being with him for a week, probably because I’m with him all the time, I can see the degeneration. I always knew it was there, but i’m used to being with him all the time. And I think that’s why it’s so hard to be separated from him because there will be just more and more degeneration.

Bob:
When did you first begin to notice the changes in dad?

Mom:
Well it was such a hard time because I was diagnosed with breast cancer and he was  diagnosed a week later with PD. So the reality was that my disease took immediate steps with surgery and chemotherapy. And dad took the role of caretaker for me. I think that took the eyes off of him. What I noticed about him, even at that time, was that his gait was different. I could hear him walking and hear the sounds his steps were making on the hardwood floor. I was probably too consumed in my own world at that time to notice that first, but I began to notice more and more. I noticed the facial, the lack of facial expression.  The smile, with one side of his face drooping down. The slowness of his left hand. And then the whole body being so much slower. The thought processes being so much slower. The stamina, not having the stamina he used to have. Not being able to complete tasks. He’s a very handy person and he likes to fix things. But things are much harder for him to do. And I think he loses interest, so...I don’t know...I was just watching it happen. It probably took a whole year of watching for me to realize, because I was so consumed by my disease, the differences. I’d say, we’re into the third year now, over the last year I’ve noticed some marked differences and they seem to be progressing. And I don’t know -- they seem faster to me. Maybe because I’m so much more aware, I watch him more closely. And I’m just heart broken -- I’m absolutely heartbroken about this disease.

Bob:
What does baseball mean to you?

Mom:
Baseball makes me smile, and mainly because of you. When I grew up, my father loved baseball. And he was always listening on the radio. We’d be listening to the Raineers who played at Sick Seattle Stadium, it was not a Major League team. And we just loved baseball. He was a coach for my brothers. There was always baseball around our house.

I got into the A’s, mainly when you and Jonny O would go to the games. Of course we had the great Bash Brothers and, you know, it was getting more and more fun to watch. Then you taught me how to read the box scores. And I really got into it. And when I went to work, I’d turn the game on the radio. I’d come home from work and I’d tell dad, “You’ve got to turn on the game.”

I really, really enjoy the game now, too. I’m not as avid of a fan as you and dad, but I do enjoy the A’s. I love the story of our team. I’m looking forward to seeing the other stadiums. I think it’s a great game and I love that it’s a great game for families. Moms, dads and children there. It’s kind of that  fourth of July, apple pie, American -- it’s our game. And I feel very proud to be an American and be at a game and have a hot dog and root for our team. It’s a great, great thing and it makes me very happy.
Bob:
Do you have a favorite player?

Mom:
Eckersley was my guy back in the late 80’s. He was such a great closer. Your heart was pounding and you’d just know he was going to do it.

Bob:
What do you think about having to take care of dad?

Mom:
I honestly get fearful that I won’t be able to do it. He was there for me when I had cancer and I so much want to be there for him. I want to be there in positive ways. I tend to over nurture him and bug the heck out of him. I want to be the kind of caretaker that he needs and wants. It breaks my heart. I just have to pray that we’ll have some research in his lifetime that he will be able to experience some help.

My plan is to take care of him as long as I can in our home. Put a ramp in the family room, do whatever I have to do. But right now, what I need to do is live one day at a time. I need to make myself strong, build my physical strength up and my mental strength for him and for myself. It’s sad because I even see now that I’m losing part of him and it breaks my heart. He’s the love of my life. I’ve been in love with him for 40 years. But I’m grateful for every day we have together. And I want to make them count. I want to have fun, I don’t want to make things change so that he feels like he’s an invalid.

We’re going to get into a support group -- we’ve got to read and learn, meet lots of people. Who knows what this trip is going to mean? Just look at the people we met Friday night. Wow. To talk to Mitch was comforting to me. He’s had the disease about the same amount of time and he’s on a different medication so maybe it’s not so scary for dad to move on to the next level. But you know we’re going to keep rockin’ and rolling and singing and dancing and -- it may be chair dancing, if we have to. He was so sweet last night, when we were at Pete’s, he said: ‘I’m so glad we didn’t miss many rock and roll dances in our lifetime. That’s very important to us. And...we may be doing chair dancing for a while, but that’s okay.

Bob:
Do you think you might give dad lap dances?

Mom:
(laughs)
Yeah. That would be his dream.

The Boys of Summer continue roll along - for the latest please see our website.

 

Boys of Summer book - Houston, June 24, 2004

This blog continues its path, sharing the inside details of the follow up to the award-winning documentary, "Boys of Summer". For more details, to watch the film or contribute to the sequel, please click here.

An email of support, sent June 24, 2004:

Dear Robert,

I'm not sure if this is the right way to contact you, but have decided to try anyway. My name is Lauren McCutcheon. I'm a board member of the Philadelphia chapter of NPF, locally named The Parkinson Council. Our chapter's web site is www.philaparkinson.org. 

If this isn't too last minute, I'd like to help in any way at all with your visit to Philly. As a member of the media, I'd be glad to contact the Phillies staff and media outlets, if you think this would be appropriate.

Looks like you, your dad and your crew are having a blast — and working really hard to make your dream come true.


Best wishes,

Lauren McCutcheon

June 24, 2004 - Bob

Houston, TX

Faith, community and miracles.

These three things are fast becoming the centerpieces of what we're doing. It warms my heart to have people come out and show the kind of support and love toward us they have. Things are opening up on a daily basis -- they've been happening so fast I find it difficult to keep track.

Sharing this journey gives me hope and belief in everything I know to be true about the goodness in people's hearts and souls. People want to give, they want to be part of something meaningful and they want to be loved. By offering what we're offering -- a community experience at an already beloved event (baseball) -- people are coming out and enjoying themselves and opening themselves up in a simple manner: just doing what they would do anyway.

When I asked my dad about this process, he just smiled and unflinchingly said these are miracles going on all around us -- I froze and tear up. It's wonderful to see how alive he is, how present he is and how happy he is.

We are grateful to and humbled by all of you the love and generosity.

Camping the night before at Guadalupe River State Park, TX

In Minute Maid Park.

For more details, to watch the film or contribute to the sequel, please click here.