June 30, 2006 - Bob
Walnut Creek, CA
Mom and dad have enrolled in a program in Seattle for them both to get more understanding about her bipolar. I’m so proud that mom’s brave enough to go to it and through it. I also admire my dad for standing by her to encourage, support and sometimes offer the bits of information my mom’s disease would rather leave in the dark. There is that odd distinction that I’ve come to accept with chronic diseases like Parkinson’s and bipolar: they are both part of us and separate from us. When we “have” them or are afflicted by them, they do become part of us. They can, in fact, overtake us and become us. We must fight daily, hourly, minute-by-minute to manage them.
Therein lies the rub: “manage” not “cure”. Some things, at least as far anyone I know understands them right now, are not curable. That’s a very contradictory thought for a people and a culture here in the U.S., in particular, that often believes it can accomplish anything, cure everything and defeat anyone.
Diseases like these are like a full plate of humility served cold. Victory, in the classic sense (i.e. annihilation, surrender) is not an option. Management is the only thing on the table.
Diseases thrive in dark, stagnant areas devoid of life, light and circulation. In the light, where they must be dealt with and where those with experience, training and compassion can help is where we can all learn to manage our difficulties, whatever they are.
It’s scary, exposing one’s self to the light. What will people think about me? What does this say about who I think I am and how I present myself? What if no one loves me? What if I am weak? What if I am worthless? What if I am a fake, a fraud, a fool?
I look forward to seeing my parents and sharing this new segment of their adventure with them.
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