You've got to have faith...or do you?

After our meeting with Dr. DeMartino today, my mom, dad and I talked about faith. Faith comes in a lot of different colors, shapes and sizes. The degree to which one has faith and in what are interesting considerations. Ten years ago, as we began the journey of the original “Boys of Summer”, I asked my dad what faith was. He said, “Faith means that I believe I have what it takes to get the job done”. That definition speaks toward faith in himself. His body has failed him to various degrees over the last ten years. Some of it is just getting older as he looks at 70 on the fast-approaching horizon; much more of it, I believe, is due to Parkinson’s Disease. Being robbed of something that you hold faith in has to shake you.

 

My dad doesn’t hold much interest in religion. He was raised Catholic and, along with my mom, raised my sister and me as Catholics. When my mom left the church, somewhere in the 1990’s, my dad left it, too. My mom says she continued to question and develop a new faith toward God and Jesus Christ as she needs to understand that. She goes to church again, today, with great passion and faith, though it’s not Catholic. My dad still doesn’t go and doesn’t seem to have any interest in it. I left the church when I went away to college. I still remember taking a mythology class and having my mind blown by the stories from other cultures, some similar, some not to the Catholic faith, many of them predating the teachings in the Bible by thousands of years. This revelation, alone, isn’t to say one is more correct than the other because of that information, but because the faith was presented to me as a closed system, with other belief systems being unquestionably wrong, this was earth-shattering to me at the time. Just recently I began to go to church again, largely for my children and my family. I’ve been enjoying it quite a bit.

  

Back to my dad and his faith: the other night we went to the Zen Center in Las Vegas. I’ve suggested my dad should incorporate meditation into his life for a number of healthful and quality of life reasons. There are an increasing number of scientific studies that point to the validity of meditation as an exercise that increases brain activity. As my dad is dealing squarely with a neurologically-based disease, so far as we understand, meditation seems like a good fit.

At the Zen Center, my dad asked the Zen Master, “If I commit seriously to meditation, what can I expect to get out of it?” Whether or not my dad knew it, he’d stepped right into a zen trap. It is in the wanting of anything that one gets lost. The Zen Master brought up the metaphor of the mind being a glass of dirty water. Through the process of meditation, one can help the sand and dirt settle to the bottom of the glass, adding clarity to the water. One cannot remove the sand itself. How can one do this? How does one know meditation “works”? It is in the doing. As my dad is a logically-minded person, this didn’t sit well with him. I offered to send him some of the science-based articles on meditation to see if they would offer him encouragement or peace of mind to continue on this unknown path, in the absence of faith. He said yes. In case you’re interested, those articles can be found here.

Dan & Robert talk

Today Dad and I spent some time in front of the camera together, something we did a lot of in the first documentary, but haven't done much of so far. Part of this has been because I've been one-man-banding this act and really focussing on shooting dad's process. Part of that is very freeing and interesting, especially since I am far more camera/image focus than I was in the past. The other side, though, that is missing, is the connection between us, literally, on screen. To that end, I offer today's video.

We talked about a number of things - golf and giving it up, which may sound antithetical against our process of trying to get my dad back to it, but if you watch the video you'll get it. We also talked about the things we take for granted, like walking and the value of said simple things. And, of course, we talked a little A's baseball - which is quite enjoyable right now with the boys tearing up the league!

We also had a very interesting meeting with Zen Master, Thomas Pastor. He's one of the teachers at the Zen Center of Las Vegas. Dad's going to begin to learn how to meditate. There are many studies, especially in the last couple of years, that point to the specific scientifically provable benefits for the brain by meditating. Almost nothing could make more sense for my dad to engage in and we're excited to start the process. 

Lastly, we talked about Giuseppe's graduation from preschool. While it might sound like a silly idea to have a graduation from preschool, if you know his medical history, which included a rough start at birth, and understand he's been there at UNLV's preschool for three years now, you'll know this is a great thing to celebrate. I'll post some pictures tomorrow.

As always, we appreciate your comments and hope you'll take a look at our book, Simple Stuff, which is still a free download for the next two days. 

Adding on: NASA, good death and meditation

We're rolling into our second week of my dad's rehabilitation with great vigor, picking up ideas as we go. Dr. DeMartino has contacted the creator of Quantum Neurology, Dr. George Gonzalez, and gotten the okay for me to interview him. Details to come.

Dad got his first lessons on the Taylormade driving range today with pro, Eric Meeks. Eric was very impressed with what he saw from my dad and was able to offer some quick tips that delivered immediate results.

"I hit some balls better today than I have in a long time," my dad said. 

Dad will continue to swing the clubs twice a week with Eric for the next few weeks. Though there's a temptation to do more, dad's taking it slowly for now.

Nathan Adelson CEO (Las Vegas), Carole Fischer

I interviewed Nathan Adelson Hospice CEO in Las Vegas, Carole Fischer on Monday morning. We had an excellent discussion about the value of discussing death in living a better life. Carole has seen many people pass on under her hospice care and is clearly moved by the experience. We talked a lot about the idea of a "good death" much as people talk about having a good day, a good career or even a good life. The fact of the matter is death is inevitable for all of us. Pretending we won't some day be gone creates a tremendous burden upon those left behind who should be dealing with the emotional loss. It's interesting, too, as I've been teaching the primacy/recency theory to some of my film students, expressing the value in memory humans have for things first and last in a list. If a life is thought of that way, who would want his lasting memory to be one of difficulty, guilt, questioning, financial burden, etc. when it could be laughter, tears of joy, knowledge and a fullness that the passing that occurred was as peaceful and undramatic as possible?

Dr. DeMartino brought up some further studies about the value of infrared light therapy and its use by NASA. Between that, the recent scholarly work by MIT, I'm hoping to push the use of this technology/treatment off of the cynical block to at least healthy skepticism for practitioners and patients alike. I appreciate, again, that Dr. DeMartino hasn't backed away from any of my challenges or questions about what is being done. He fully acknowledges the difficulty both in his own group of peers (naturopaths and chiropractors) as well as with those who use other modalities (particularly those considered "western" or AMA doctors). It's going to take time, results and constant messaging. I hope we're part of a positive movement with our documentary.

Finally, meditation is the newest addition to dad's treatment. We're going to visit the Zen Center in Las Vegas and make that a regular part of dad's practice. If meditation is like a workout for your brain and the brain is the area most affected - or most immediately affected -- by Parkinson's, it only makes sense to put dad on the mediation treadmill and make his grey matter sweat. If it's good enough for the Dalai Lama, it's good enough for us.